Summer is bearing down upon us and so is the most fearful word in the English language -- swimwear. Sooner or later we all have to buy a swimsuit and we women like this seasonal ritual about about as much as filing our tax returns.

But this season offers hope. For those among us who aren't blessed with Gisele's bod, now is as good a time as any to hit the fitting rooms. Why? Because, one-pieces, like the throng Dolce & Gabbana (pictured above) sent down the runway, have the ability to cover up imperfections without a whiff of dowdy. If bikinis are more your thing, there are plenty of boy bottoms cut à la Marilyn Monroe that hide a lot more than the essentials. Of course, if you are a Gisele, there are still plenty of ways to show off your assets.

Here's a cheat sheet on who's doing what in swimwear. Then, ladies, gather up your courage, go forth and shop!

RETRO '50s: Designers have gone back to the days of Harry Truman, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof and the birth of Rock 'n Roll. Maurizio Pecoraro, Stella McCartney, Moschino Cheap & Chic, and Hervé Leger all presented swimwear that jumped out of the mid-century. These silhouettes sit oh-so-low on the leg, but still read sexy because of their emphasis on the waist.

CUTOUTS: Not for the faint of heart. If the retro style is Marilyn Monroe, swimwear with cutouts are more like Grace Jones. Tim Hamilton, Gucci, Roksanda Ilincic, Jen Kao, and Yigal Azrouël sent out suits with a touch of the '80s and a good dose of fierce.

THE DEEP V: The swimwear equivalent of J. Lo's famed Versace dress, deep Vs are de rigueur. Jasmine di Milo, Milly and Twenty8Twelve showed V necks plunging down there that promise to boost the sex appeal of the waif-ish, in particular.

ONE SHOULDER: Gone are the days of the matronly one-piece. Taking a cue from evening wear over the last several seasons, Emporio Armani, Unique, Michael Kors, and Diane von Furstenberg designed swimwear that drape over one-shoulder, with some incorporating cutouts.

ITSY BITSY: Gisele's milieu. Jean Paul Gaultier, Dsquared2 and Emporio Armani used fabric sparingly in their swim collections. Waists are as low as they can go while tops are tiny triangles held together by a string. One-pieces take cutouts to another level -- one from Gaultier is in a harlequin pattern.

Check out the gallery for the latest looks.

Finally, a designer -- not a celebrity -- getting tapped to design a major label!

On May 1, Erin Fetherston will start her stint as guest designer and creative consultant for Juicy Couture with plans to design the line until the end of 2011. As soon as the holiday season, 2010, you can get your hands on limited edition pieces that will no doubt incorporate the girly, fairytale-like Fetherston stamp.

Juicy Couture, as I'm sure most of you are well aware, is known for the iconic velor track suits that every fashionista donned to do everything but exercise or go to the gym. They were too nice for that! As the trend started to wane, the company was acquired by Liz Claiborne that had a deal to eventually phase out co-founders and designers Gela Nash-Taylor and Pamela Skaist-Levy. The two gave up their control of day-to-day operations earlier this year.

By the looks of things, the marriage will be a good one: Both designer and brand are from California, Juicy has always been Fetherston-level girly and both appear to need the other. WWD reported that Nordstrom dropped Juicy Couture for fall and some new creative blood might drive interest again and help the brand steer clear of becoming just another corporate brand.

No longer content with rockin' the usual cocktail dress and stilettos on the red carpet, celebrities have turned to body art. Body painting is having a moment at press events, concerts, in magazines and on TV.

A few weeks ago, Ke$ha started tongues wagging about her glow-in-the-dark neon body paint and Native American headdress she wore on Saturday Night Live. Not many were getting the tribal-warrior-in-space thing. Critics complained of sensory overload, noting that the visual mayhem distracted from her mediocre performance (maybe that was the point).

Back in March, British singer Leona Lewis (pictured above) sported an eye patch at Perez Hilton's birthday bash. No doubt just following the dress code for the carnival-themed party, nymag.com poked fun at her for wearing a clown collar and a lace eye patch.

In February Soccer players WAGS (wives and girlfriends in British slang) Sarah Brander, Abbey Clancy, Bethany Dempsey and Melissa Satta were photographed in body paint by Joanne Gair for the Sports Illustrated 2010 swimsuit issue. Gair is the body paint guru having painted models for the swimsuit issue 12 years. Most of you probably know her work from the Demi Moore's Birthday Suit cover for Vanity Fair back in the '90s.

And, of course, what would a Hugh Hefner Playboy party be without nude bunnies running around in painted-on bikinis and corsets? And, last year, a Carnival queen in Sao Paulo grabbed headlines for painting President Barack Obama's face on her left thigh.

Le Festival de Cannes got underway yesterday bringing Hollywood to the French Riviera. Among the highlights expected this week? The debut of Sir Ridley Scott's Robin Hood and Oliver Stone's Wall Street sequel.

But it's not the films that interest us. It's the fashion shows.

First up, the Robin Hood premiere: Kate Beckinsale and Eva Longoria (pictured above), in particular, did not disappoint the fashion gods. Both showed up in frilly frothy gowns with dramatic trains of tiered chiffon worthy of the crimson carpet. Beckinsale chose Marchesa. Longoria was in Emilio Pucci. (Pucci, by the way, has created a limited edition caftan to be sold in their Cannes boutique to celebrate the festival.)

Cate Blanchett attended a press conference in an elegant in a Giorgio Armani Privé daytime dress and later made an entrance (and headlines) in a black, off-the-shoulder gown designed by the late designer Alexander McQueen. The dress is emblazoned, front and back, with a silver eagle taking flight and was part of the last collection designed by McQueen before the designer killed himself in February.

Meanwhile, Salma Hayek debuted the first ever haute couture collection from Gucci Premiere in the form of a deep red Bordeaux silk one-shoulder draped gown. Yes, surprisingly, the Italian house has never in its history produced an haute couture collection.

Who likes short shorts?

Apparently everybody, as evidenced by the number of cropped breeches seen on the catwalks and red carpet recently. Ciara, Gwyneth, Nicole and a host of other celebrities have taken shorts out for a spin on the crimson. It doesn't seem to matter much whether it's cold outside or not. In fact, it was bitingly cold during fashion week in New York in February when Kylie Minogue decided to grace the front row in shiny black vinyl shorts.

Shorts have been around for centuries, of course. The descendants of kilts and togas, they were the look for young school boys. Soldiers stationed in hot places like Bermuda adopted the look for relief from the heat which then quickly influenced civilians. Women followed later. Audrey Hepburn, Marilyn Monroe and Jackie O. were often photographed in shorts.

Once only appropriate to wear starting this weekend (Memorial Day) through Labor Day, cut to today and the look is so prevalent almost every designer inserted a pair of shorts in his or her fall/winter collections. A few highlights: If one were to wear shorts on to the North Pole, Chanel had an option-gray fur shorts with furry boots and a patterned ski sweater. Salvatore Ferragamo struck a '70s vibe with rust leather shorts shown under a rust suede maxi coat and brown belted cable knit sweater and further punctuated with rust suede boots and a brown cable knit cap. Dolce & Gabbana had shorts you could wear to a meeting on Wall Street-a mauve boiled wool short suit with the knee length shorts, cuffed and modest.

The haute couture shows in Paris are in full swing, but rather than enjoy the spectacle, fashion watchers have the nagging suspicion they are witnessing the end of an era.

Sure, clothing that can cost as much as a house, have little relevance in today's world-only a handful of women in the world can afford the custom-made pieces. And fashion houses like Jean Paul Gaultier, pictured above, create the looks mostly for press and to promote brand awareness and maintain an image. (Dita Von Teese guest strutted in black wire and stockings.) But the Great Recession has sped up the decline of an institution of fashion, the highest level a designer can achieve, the crème de la crème of the biz. It's sad!

Signs of decline are all there. Shows have been reduced to six spanning three days. Sets have been pared back. Givenchy eschewed a show altogether to stage "presentations," or museum like display on dress forms-a sure sign of financial conservatism.

"Why not just hang a sign on the door that says, 'Shut?'" wrote Cathy Horyn yesterday in The New York Times.

The bouffant, the piled-high hairstyle popularized in the late '50s and early '60s, is back!

Amy Winehouse has been rockin' a beehive for years. But, this year, bouffants kicked into high gear and were seen on the runways of Chanel, Dior, Oscar de la Renta (above) and Vera Wang. On the celeb front Lady Gaga, Jennifer Lopez, Jessica Simpson and Kate Beckinsale have all given it a whirl.

Bouffant. Pompadour. Whatever you call it, it was born in France, reportedly first introduced by Madame de Pompadour who was a mistress of Louis XV. But the real bouffant as we know it today was created for Marie Antoinette, who apparently wanted to mask her thin hair. Closer to the truth, it was the fashion. And, as we know, Antoinette was not exactly known for her restraint.

According to Daring 'Dos: A History of Extraordinary Hair, by Mary Trasko, both Pompadour and Antoinette wore their hair high on the forehead, either brushed over a pad or "frizzed." Some estimated the towering styles stretched three feet high. Hair was such a production back then, women slept propped up on pillows. Our quips today that animals could live in those things was more than partly right-the pomades back then were made of lard and attracted vermin.

By the '60s, the style had become so commonplace in the West, it spread to American suburbs. Throngs of women made their weekly trips to the hair salon, usually Fridays. Wash. Set. Tease. And use lots of industrial strength hair spray. Teachers complained about girls whose hair was so big that they blocked other students from seeing the blackboard.

Luxury fashion designers, who've long shunned e-commerce, are caving in.

Last week, The New York Times reported that Marc Jacobs (fall show pictured above), Jimmy Choo, Hugo Boss, St. John, Theory, Kiehls, Lilly Pulitzer, Donna Karan and La Perla are finally going to do on the Web what they do in the real world: sell stuff!

To a person in any other industry, I can imagine how crazy this must sound. Companies in the business of selling stuff have not caught on to selling stuff on the Web, a medium that has been around for several decades!

"'The classic luxury brand Web site is basically a Flash site with lots of beautiful imagery, but no one ever goes to it,'" Aaron Shapiro, a partner at the Web design firm Huge, told the NYT.

There are department stores like Neiman Marcus, Saks Fifth Avenue and Bergdorf Goodman to consider. What happens to their online sites, not to mention brick and mortar stores, if you can go straight to Balenciaga.com and order those Formica and plywood platform loafers thereby cutting out the middleman?

Reed Krakoff's (Coach president and creative director) new ready-to-wear line this fall featured them. So did Pringle of Scotland. January Jones broke them out for the annual summer Louis Vuitton/Vanity Fair party on Rodeo Drive.

Skinny pants, could your end finally be in sight? Roomy, high-waisted trousers are showing up everywhere.

This isn't the first time roomy trousers have tried to get a jump on the ubiquitous skinny. For a brief moment in 2007, high-waisted wide legged jeans flooded the marketplace. In '08, the wide-legged palazzo had a moment. A year ago, the harem pants made a run for it gaining many headlines and about half as many fans.

What makes this time different? Time will tell.

Fashion is like a pendulum. For every action, there is a reaction. It was always a matter of time before flowing pants nudged skinny off her perch. It usually takes a few tries before the eye gets used to the new look. Even fashion critics who are used to continuous change, are hard to convince. Earlier this year, style.com had this to say on Pringle's slouchy trousers inspired by wading boots: "That's a lot of pant for a body to wear."

JetBlue's Steven Slater, the flight attendant who grabbed a couple brews, deployed the airplane slide and said, "take this job and shove it," has become a modern-day folk hero. He certainly set the bar high for how to quit a job with flair.

But did you know Slater was also on the JetBlue's uniform redesign committee? Not only that but he was Chairman, according to businessinsider.com. No doubt he had had it up to here with the JetBlue look, too.

How quickly glory fades. Ten years ago, JetBlue uniforms were the height of chic. Stan Herman designed the window-pane checked midnight blue shirts, midnight blue trousers and skirts. Male flight attendants, like Slater, probably wore a tie with a pattern made to look like a plane's tail fins. Female counterparts could either wear blue check or polka dot scarves.

In 2001, JetBlue's uniforms were recognized for being utilitarian and "Prada-esque" and won design awards and accolades, even one from the Fashion Institute of Technology in New York. The fashion school hosted an exhibition "Work in Uniform: Dressed for Detail" that featured JetBlue's uniforms.

But that was then. No telling what Slater and the committee have been planning. Or who they were collaborating with.

Woolly mammoth ivory jewelry is everywhere.

Luxury retailer Stanley Korshak in Dallas can't keep it in stock. Michelle Obama has been photographed numerous times wearing it. For CFDA design darling Monique Péan and Ivory Jacks in Bothel, Washington, that create jewelry out of the material, business has been good.

The First Lady wore woolly mammoth jewelry by Monique Péan on a trip to Mexico a few months ago (pictured above and below)-specifically earrings, cuffs and strands. She wore the cuffs again recently to greet President Obama on his 49th birthday. The cuffs go for $4,480 to $7,420 at www.twistonline.com. The earrings can fetch anywhere between $915 and $2,970 at www.barneys.com.

Unlike elephant ivory which is primarily off-white, woolly mammoth ivory is unique in that it has many different colors-tan, brown and sometimes blue. Ivory Jacks jewelry designer Courtney Tripp explained to me this week at the Gift Show in New York that the colors are a result of thousands of years of mineralization. No two tusks are the same color. So no two mammoth jewelry pieces can be exactly the same.

The fashion world is buzzing about September 10. That's when people like Vogue chief Anna Wintour, Donna Karan, New York City Mayor Bloomberg and members of the Council of Fashion Designers of America will hang out with mere mortals like you and me at stores and boutiques in NYC.

The point? Shopping. And it's a boost to retailers, fashion designers and ultimately the whole fashion industry that has been pummeled of late.

This year's extravaganza is apparently bigger than last year's. On a geographical scale, it certainly is, with events planned for stores in Los Angeles, Paris, Milan and London. Okay, you expect those cities. But Fashion's Night Out is also popping up in unexpected destinations around the globe. Jamaica? China? India? Apparently so.

Aside from shopping, or at least window shopping, Fashion's Night Out is chance for non-fashion industry people to get a glimpse of what a real invitation-only fashion industry party is like. Doesn't hurt that September 10 is the start of New York fashion week, so everybody will be in town. And, this year, there will be cameras around filming for a CBS Special.

Last year, Bergdorf Goodman was a madhouse. Victoria Beckham and Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen were there, along with designers Georgina Chapman, Mark Badgley and James Mischka and Zac Posen. Charlize Theron showed up at Dior, Kate Hudson at Stella McCartney.

I can see the lines snaking around the block now! H&M confirmed it: Men and women will be able to get themselves some Lanvin at about 200 H&M stores on Nov. 23, according to Women's Wear Daily.

Word broke yesterday that the sizzling hot Paris label may be collaborating with cheap chic retailer H&M. Fashion industry bible WWD reported that the Swedish retailer was expected to announce plans with Lanvin and its creative director Alber Elbaz within the coming week.

Upon hearing the news yesterday, the fashion blogs went nuts, writing things like "Yes, Please!" and "Cross your fingers." Even a few well-heeled ladies I talked to vowed they would pick up a piece or ten from the capsule collection.

To wet our appetites, H&M has been posting 23-second highly stylized black and white videos on Facebook and Youtube. Quotes from a mystery designer comes through the mouths of male and female actors captured in flashing images that show everything but an actual face. Initially, the rumor mill focused on Tomas Maier of Bottega Venetta and Carolina Herrera as possible originators of the quotes. Then, WWD wrote yesterday: "While the camera never lingers on the faces long enough for recognition in the clips, the voice-over of designer musings, while electronically altered, are unmistakable Elbaz-isms."

New York is still recovering from fashion week and, less than a week later, London fashion week has already come and gone. There's a lot to talk about.

Jude Law sat front row at Sienna Miller's Twenty8Twelve show because he loves her, the actor told WWD. Designer Matthew Williamson also sat front row (Miller returned the favor and warmed the front row for Williamson). Miller, who designs the line with her sister Savannah, sent out lace, embroidery, prints and color designed for a girl on a journey from Mexico to Thailand circa 1950. The collection was inspired by Joni Mitchell's "Don Juan's reckless daughter" album.

Last but definitely not least. Paris provided the grand finale this week to a string of fashion weeks around the globe that began in New York early September.

While not quite as colorful as their Italian counterparts, Parisian designers delivered collections consistent their houses' heritages. In other words, each brands' fans will be happy. Some of the highlights:

Alexander McQueen was one of the most anticipated shows of the season. It was the first full collection for Sarah Burton who was thrust into the head designer role when the designer committed suicide earlier this year. The verdict? There were stunners such as the ombrè gown pictured above as well as white low-rise pants with two buckles on each hip and sculptural dresses. It's not quite the same anger, beauty or arty story that has always defined the label. But how can it be? I would hate to be Burton who must be burdened with endless comparisons to the late genius.

Chanel's show was darker and more deconstructed than usual. Black dresses looked they had been eaten by moths, edges were tattered, and there were much less fussy versions of the signature Chanel suit. Ines de la Fressange modeled my favorite piece-a black sheer floor-length gown with a cutaway skirt that revealed a slimmer skirt underneath. The gown's blouson featured heavy black stripes reminiscent of Maori tribal tattoos.